**this journal is about 90% friends only.
If you want me to add you back, please comment here. If you just want to stalk my lj for whatever fun that might bring you go ahead;)
I spent a few hours last night reading old LJ entries (circa 2006) for inspiration for a play I'm writing. It's about what happens backstage during a play, and what "types" of actors are commonly found.
But oh, those old entries. I am so glad I wrote them, but getting back in that headspace is depressing. And what's worse is that I often feel that way- still. Like I'm just outside of the circle I want to be in. But they're doing everything to keep me out ("they" being those people I'm writing about in my play). It's so frustrating because I see the stuff I want to do. I COULD do it. But I have so many limitations. I am not part of a group. It's just me. I don't have connections, because nobody wants to give me the time of day. Not even to spend an hour to come see my show! And what can I do about that? Nothing. I can't force people to support me.
I just wish I knew WHY. That's what I can't wrap my head around. What is it about me?
I want to write plays so bad. I want to see them performed.
I need to get out this mood.
You Have a Serious Heart
You believe that love is not a mystery. Love is respect, nurturing, and affection. Love is not drama.
You love with your head before you love with your heart. It's not love if it doesn't make sense.
Your heart is not easily tricked or fooled. You only have feelings when it is the real thing.
Your love life is only a part of your whole life. Love has its place, but you don't obsess over it.